RIP Redheaded Ladymoji

RIP Redheaded Ladymoji

I enjoy using gratuitous emojis when I’m texting. Why say “I’m kidding” to convey your tone after a really solid your mama joke, when a winky-face (😉) does all the work for you? What better way is there to show sheepishness than the little monkey with his hands over his mouth (🙊)? As someone who serves up emojis left and right, I have some thoughts beyond the usual commentary on what 🍆 means.

A PSA about this emoji: 😬 . Y’all, this face is sporting a grimace. Please spare your friends and family the confusion and use it as such. Grimace emoji is not a face with a big toothy smile. That face is obviously this face: 😁. For example, you might say, “I have contracted tuberculosis 😬”, in which case you’d be setting the perfect example for how to use this emoji. You’re sending the wrong message when you say something like, “Out celebrating 10 years with my wonderful husband! 😬” Ouch. Sorry, hubby.

A suggestion about this emoji: 😐 . I think Blank Stare Straight Mouth (BSSM) emoji is way underused. Take it for a spin! It’s so effective at bringing a certain “I have no words for this, but can we agree it’s ridiculous?” flair. Like when the camera cuts to Jim Halpert on The Office, he’s often making this face. BSSM is really good for exchanges like this: Friend says, “(Name of that girl we think is annoying, probably something like Jessica) has just posted 19 photos of her sleeping infant.”  I can reply with a simple and effective “😐”. (Also… ugh, Jessica! If you’re reading this, I have a message for you: 🙄)

Jessica! (I typed “annoying girl” into the search bar on Pixabay and this came up. It’s probably exactly what she looks like.)

In closing, some feedback for the developers of emojis who are definitely reading this:  Can I get a redheaded emoji again, please? A few months ago, before you added so many emoji variations for skin tone, hair color, etc., a redhead was the default lady emoji. She was the ladymoji. I think it’s fantastic that more people can find an emoji to identify with these days (seriously, good decision), but why did you kill the redheaded ladymoji? What did she ever do to you? Probably just looked too awesome for you to even handle it. Now I’m forced to identify with these emojis, because they are similarly red and white in color: 🤡🎅🏻🐔🍄⏰🇮🇩
Stay tuned for Part II of this post: How can you have Emojis for the Following Damn Things and not an Emoji for a Redheaded Person? , title pending review from my agent.*

*I don’t have an agent.

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